Eva Longoria flashes back to the 80s

Written by Sherry

While I do love the bold, vivid blue color, that top is screaming 1980s. I wonder if there are shoulder pads in there for good measure?

Kelly goes to prom

Written by Sherry

This dress that Kelly Osbourne is wearing? I think I saw it before. I think it was worn by the unpopular girl in one of those prom movies set in the 1980s.

Elisha Cuthbert steps out of the 80s into our world

Written by Sherry

I didn’t like the ripped sleeves look back in the 80s and I can’t say it looks any better this time around.

And the silver, shiny tights. Oh my. And hey, they match the 80s-style belt. Woo!

I confess, not all 80s comebacks are bad. Personally, I love that black stretch pants are back (as long as everyone remembers to wear long sweaters over them to avoid the aerobics class look). But shimmery tights without feet, under a black belted dress with shredded shoulders? Just NO.

Penelope Cruz and the bow seen from space

Written by Sherry

Penelope Cruz is one of those perplexing women in Hollywood. First of all, she’s gorgeous, no doubt. And there are times she chooses and outfit and your jaw drops and it’s amazing how spectacular she looks.

Then there are the other times.

The color is vibrant and different from your usual little black dress, but the bow! The bow that is so large it can be seen from space! Unless I’ve slipped back to 1989, I’m pretty sure there is no logical reason for a dress to come equipped with a bow that is one third the length of the dress itself.

More 80s flashback horror

Written by Sherry

Natalie Portman is making me want to cry lately. She is ridiculously pretty and yet lately she’s always wearing crazy makeup that makes me weep or clothes that should go back to the 80s and stay there.

Take this t-shirt mini dress. I don’t care if it’s silk, that doesn’t make it automatically classy, it just makes it a silky bad dress. Honestly, the biggest problem with t-shirt dresses is, and always has been, the fact that the person wearing them always looks like she ran out of the house in a mad rush, completely forgetting to put on a pair of pants. Don’t people have nightmares about doing exactly that?

Paula Abdul flashes back

Written by Sherry

Paula Abdul has blasted herself back to the 80s and 90s. I’m pretty sure I saw someone wearing this dress at my high school graduation and it wasn’t a good choice even back then, let alone now. Unless you’re starring in a movie from that era, there’s just no excuse for this monstrosity.

Not everything is black or white

Written by Sherry

Kristen Bell has landed a new role! Look! She’s going to be playing the prom queen in a movie that takes place in 1987.

She’s not? Oh! She’s doing irony right! No?

Uhhh. Okay then. Simple - Kristen, if you don’t want to look like you just stepped out of the 80s, don’t wear satin mini dresses in black and white with a giant ruffly off-the-shoulder top.

There is just NO excuse unless it involves a movie role.

Kim Kardashian’s rear view

Written by Sherry

Some people are talking about the proportions of Kim Kardashian’s butt compared to the rest of her body, but frankly, I don’t care about her ass. I want to know why on earth she thought she should go out in an electric blue spandex-ish dress. Didn’t David Bowie wear something similar to this once upon an era?

Flashdance is over now

Written by Sherry

Jessica Biel looks like she just stepped off the set of Flashdance. I wish people wouldn’t keep trying to bring back the 80s. We had great movies, great TV, and awesome music. But frankly the styles were horrendous and we should just bury them all and pretend they never happened.

Bow dresses

Written by Sherry

Again with the big bows on dresses. It doesn’t matter whether it’s Nicole Richie (who is smaller than the bow) or Brittany Snow. They’re still a bad idea.

I don’t understand why designers are suddenly taking otherwise nice, simple dresses and then sticking enormous bows on them. It didn’t work in the 80s and early 90s (and I still regret attending prom with a giant bow on my ass) and it doesn’t work now. Please go away, bows, go away!

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